Our chapter hosted a successful webinar on February 15, called Be Your Own Valentine: Feminist Tools & Tips. Members logged in from five separate states to share their tips on self care, including below. Do you have a self-care tip not on the list? Email us or comment below!
Create or expand your Feminist Force Field (FFF). What is a FFF? It’s a loving and protective barrier our members have created around each other. We support each other in person, on email, via text and any other way necessary. We remind each other that we’re not the ones who need fixing when society tells us we’re overreacting to hate. Society needs to change its sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia, ageism, adultism, classism, ableism and all the other isms. But our members do more than just support each other. We also challenge each other to be our very best. We educate each other on the explicit and implicit biases society suffocates us with. We continuously create a loving and safe space. President Jerin Arifa pictures the members forming a physical barrier around her, when she needs extra support. Try it for yourself! Join Us, so we can extend our FFF to you.
Limit your exposure to detractors. Successful women from Oprah Winfrey to Michelle Obama have warned us against detractors. Detractors are people who do not inspire us to be our best selves. They sap our energy. They question our abilities. Quite often, they don't identify as feminists. Sadly, this includes family members for many of us. The Law of Physics says that only one object can occupy any given space. If your time is bogged down with detractors, there's no space to create or expand your FFF.
Reach out to a friend. Whether via text, email or phone, remember that you are not alone.
- Create a Grateful Journal for yourself. Write down all the things you did right that day, to fight against the self doubt and societal pressure to be perfect.
Compile all the compliments you receive in one document. If it’s written, just copy and paste into this one document. If it’s verbal, write down the name of the person, date and content. We like Google Docs.
Write a love letter to yourself, based on the compliments above. Compose it as if the person you admire the most were writing those compliments to you.
If possible, exercise. I know this is not easy or possible for everyone, with various schedules, motivations and physical abilities. Take small steps -- maybe walk down one flight of stairs, instead of taking the elevator the whole way.
- If lacking confidence, imagine you are the person your most loving friend or family member thinks of you as. For a few hours, behave as if you believed the same.
Be careful about the media you consume. We've been feeling triggered by the political news, since the entire nation is being gaslighted. Some of our members are choosing not to watch the news, instead to read it. Some of us have worked in the domestic violence field, and we don't need to feel triggered by the physical behaviors of certain politicians, who remind us of abusers.
Take a break from social media. Even for an hour.
Spend time in nature. This may be more difficult for some of us living in large cities, like New York. But there are opportunities even in concrete jungles.
Do you have a self-care tip not on the list? Comment below!